regret... is the ugly sister of lament.
i was just talking about this concept with one of my good brothers...
and in our lives, we do hold a lot of emotional baggage - much of that regret.
no matter how much you tell yourself not to feel regret or that you shouldn't be regretful of things in the past, you feel it anyway. admit it. it took me a long time to just swallow my pride and admit that i regret a lot of things in my life.
this whole phase of rebellion will probably go under my top 10 regrets, no doubt.
yet this whole regret feeling shouldn't lead us to feel so much self-pity as to a necessary drive for improvement. improve yourself so that you won't regret the next similar situation, or improve your attitude so that you yourself can deter the feeling of regret.
i'd rather choose the first one.
however, the ironic thing is that many people choose the latter strategy unconsciously.
and they build themselves to be cold, heartless scumbags playing with the entire world, leading innocent individuals to the dark side, and feeling no remorse for it.
though i say this, i do not leave myself out of the formula. i'm actually becoming the cold, ruthless bastard. yet i am trying to resist it so strongly.
i know that i don't want to be that person - the person i used to be in the past. don't let it come back. yet... the life that i currently live definitely does not help any part of this situation. i might as well give up. but i won't.
i genuinely believe that even though some people aren't christians, that they can live their lives to be good people. just for the sake of others, not for themselves. i believe that people can have the capacity for this. it may not be commonplace, but it's definitely not impossible.
i digress.
regret. i live with it currently, and i doubt i'll ever be able to overcome it - so long as i'm human and i constantly make mistakes here and there. in fact, i dealt with a huge regretful situation not too long ago, and my goal is not just to not let it happen again in the future but also to learn.
-ajc
learn and live. L&L
AID for AIDS - assisting individual's dreams
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